I’m sorry, I realize this is the second photo of the day I’ve posted of a recent TV show obsession. However, I’ve been home alone for almost a week, trying to breathe through one nostril, not drink too much Nyquil, and not get cabin fever. The other night, I thought there was someone trying to break in my house and I slept cuddled up next to the phone and had to Google the German emergency number because I forgot it (it’s 112 guys, don’t worry). Cut me a little slack here.
This show was introduced to me by my boss and is the most genius comedy I’ve seen since the Office. Its style: smart, quick and sarcastic. I’ve been choking on my bronchial phlegm all day.
Jeff: I’m saying you’re a football player, its in your blood
Troy: That’s racist
Jeff: Your soul?
Troy: That’s racist
Jeff: Your eyes?
Troy: That’s gay.
Jeff: That’s homophobic.
Troy: That’s black.
Jeff: That’s racist!
Abed [to Britta about Jeff]: Draw the tape worm out of him with the bowl of milk that is your sexuality.
Pierce: So what’s the deal Jeff, you leave your stones in your other suit? Why didn’t you rap that guy in the face?
Jeff: For the same reason I floss, have a bed frame, and keep my guitar in its case. I’m over 23.
Annie: If this article breaks out, I can apply for journalism scholarships. Nobody will care about my time in rehab if they think I’m a writer!
Abed: I thought you were like Bill Murray in any of his films, but you’re more like Michael Douglas in any of his films.
Professor Duncan: Not to be all particular, but you’re not a professor
Señor Chang: Maybe because I don’t look like Ron Weasley.
Professor Duncan: That’s the reason, that’s the qualifying factor.
Jeff: We’re the only species on Earth that observes Shark Week.
Abed: Our first assignment is a documentary, they’re like real movies but with ugly people.
Britta: What can I do?
Annie: You can hang the Chacata Panecos piniata
Britta: You guys realize he was beaten to death, right?
Shirley: That’s where we got the idea from.